A psychologist’s advice on dealing with depression in relationships

Depression is the leading cause of disability in the U. Odds are that at some point you have already or will eventually date someone with major depressive disorder. Dating someone with depression can put added strain on your relationship. It can make it harder to connect with them, becoming a wall that separates you. The bad news is that depression will always be present in some form if you are dating someone with MDD. The good news is that there is plenty you can do to make your relationship a happier and better one.

Depression in Relationships: When to Say Goodbye

Experts estimate that 15 percent of adults will experience depression at some point. If you love a depressed person and put in the effort, you might shine more light and warmth on your relationship than ever before. You can help your partner stick with therapies by offering rides to appointments, cooking healthy meals and going on walks.

Thankfully, it’s far from impossible for people who struggle with depression to date around casually or wind up in awesome relationships.

Depression is devastating. When someone is experiencing depression, their entire life is blown apart. It can be a massive struggle just to make it through each day. But they aren’t the only ones who struggle. Often forgotten are the loved ones of a person with depression. No-one tells them how to cope. They don’t know what to do. I would like to try and offer some advice to those people. Knowing somebody you love is struggling with depression leaves you feeling incredibly helpless.

You feel if you could say the right thing, or do something special, that maybe you will be able to help them to get better.

This Is What You Need to Know When Dating Someone With Depression

There are just a few things you should probably know. Mind has some great information. If we do something wrong, criticise our actions, not us as a person. Language is powerful in itself, but a depressed person will read into what you say, take it deeply personally, and analyse it for hours until it confirms every bad thing we think about ourselves. Be careful.

By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process, you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark.

Dating someone with depression can be an intimidating prospect, but by understanding a few basics you can set the stage for a strong and loving relationship. By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process , you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark on this new adventure. Starting a relationship can be an exhilarating time; everything is new and exciting and there is so much to discover.

Everyone feels sad from time to time, but depression is different than normal mood fluctuations. Understanding the reality of depression is vital to being a good ally as you embark on your relationship. Educate yourself about the illness; there are endless online resources where you can read about depression from both medical and personal standpoints to help you gain a deeper understanding of what the illness looks and feels like.

Instead, ask them about their experience and respect their boundaries. Stay flexible and consider activities that are within their comfort zone. Instead of going out to dinner, have a nice meal at home. Instead of going to that party, stay in and watch movies.

What it feels like to love with a man with depression

Depression and anxiety are difficult — and, at times, debilitating — conditions. While everyone encounters obstacles throughout the course of their romances, they can put a heavy strain on your relationship. These mental illnesses may affect how your partner thinks, feels, and behaves.

When you’re in the midst of a depressive episode, it is not the time to date. Take it from someone who’s been on both sides.

Have a question? Email her at dear. My boyfriend and I are in our early 20s, and we recently moved in together after being in a long-distance relationship for four years. I can barely get a normal conversation. I feel so alone. He is trying to get help, but he refuses to go on any medications or stick with a plan to get better for very long. I am so scared that this is going to always be his life—a constant roller-coaster ride controlled by depression. I want so much more for him, and for us. When he is not in the throes of depression, my boyfriend is hilarious, loving, and really fun.

I feel like I may have taken that away from him by moving him away from his home. For four years, we lived only an hour or two apart; then I got a job out of state, and he was so supportive of the idea that he told me I had to go, and even decided to come with me—leaving his family, friends, and comfort zone behind.

Dear Therapist: My Boyfriend’s Depression Is Making Me Question Our Future Together

It takes a lot of give-and-take from both parties to build a long-lasting relationship. With that said, dating someone with depression makes it much harder to achieve that goal. It might be hard for you to separate these feelings, so you blame yourself for the depression.

It’s Mental Health Awareness Week and we’re looking at people’s experiences of mental health issues – their own and those of their loved ones.

Breaking up is never easy. Breaking up when your partner is struggling with a psychiatric disorder can be downright painful. But there comes a time in every relationship when it may be necessary to evaluate your options and make difficult choices. No one wants to be accused of abandoning a loved one at their time of greatest need. But neither should you remain in a strained relationship with no conceivable future out of a sense of duty or guilt.

Otherwise you may be consumed by guilt or self-doubt, wondering if you did all you could do for your partner — and your relationship. Their illness may cause them to lash out at others. As the person closest to the patient, you are an easy target. Try not to take it personally. Share your concerns with trusted friends and family members. Ask for advice and support. Take an occasional breather.

Realize that your needs are important, too.

Dating someone with anxiety and depression

In retrospect, this man was not a good match for me, but it was still a very painful experience, both because a serious relationship had ended and because I felt ashamed and thought that my depression had made me unlovable. Since this experience, I have learned a lot about my mental health and no longer feel ashamed of something beyond my control. With this self-knowledge, caring for my mental health has played a more positive role in all my other relationships.

I have been able to communicate effectively about my health to significant others and now to my husband. They may have crying spells, feelings of hopelessness, insomnia or over-sleeping, and changes in appetite.

1. Depression Is Treatable · Therapy to talk through feelings or reframe reactions. · Medications, including antidepressants and mood stabilizers.

In a perfect world, dating would be like a romantic comedy from the ’90s. But dating and relationships are anything but simple. Hello, adulting. Depression affects nearly 20 percent of adults in the U. So yeah, that means you might one day find yourself in a relationship with someone who’s struggling. Worth noting: Depression can strike at any time, so even if you’re in an LTR, you might one day find your partner dealing with persistent sadness, anxiety, pessimism, sudden loss of interest in normally joyous activities or decrease in energy or ongoing fatigue read more about depression here.

Just like any other struggle, depression can add stress to a relationship, says Heather Lofton, Ph. But there are some ways to navigate it while keeping your bond strong. Educating yourself on what happens when people struggle with depression can help you understand what they’re going through. Knowing what’s happening to a loved one experiencing depression can help you approach them with empathy. But, at the same time, know that you may also feel resentful sometimes, and that’s normal. This means, rather than trying to offer solutions or talk them out of their feelings e.

Compassion can go a long way to making them feel supported. Encourage healthy behaviors, which are important for them to feel well, says Bobby.

Love Someone Who Has Depression? This is What You Need to Know.